Hello Hurricane
you can't
silence my love
Speak up or die
Tammie says Smile!

Hello there, Stranger!
Welcome to my humble little blog.

The name's Tammie, but friends call me Tam (not 'thumb').

Who am I, you ask?
I'm not that smart top-scorer girl in your class.
I'm not that pretty lass you always see on the streets either.
I am passionate, stubborn and emotional.
My absolute most favorite thing to do is hanging out with people I care & love.
My passion burns for Jesus & photography.
I wish to travel more and see more.

This blog was created so I get to jot down my feelings.
Happenings in life.
That is, if I'm not too lazy to update ;)

Blogger Buddies :3

Shanlyn Yin Nancy Cynthia ChinTeng Jocelyn Choulyew KarNee Amanda XinYong JiaWen Gacky MingSheng Alex WeiShze Netty Chii Ace Dominic Nicholas
Sunday, September 20, 2009 @ 4:37 PM
Nothing actually..

That's me, the *squeal*-ing bawang.

you can probably guess my mood at the moment :)

Smile! :)

P/S: Oh before I forget! SELAMAT HARI RAYA to all my fiends celebrating Raya!^^

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Friday, September 18, 2009 @ 9:35 AM
Kath & Rachel
my cousin & my sister

They are saying:
'You may be cute, but you'll never be like us, two winking eyes cute!'

I <3 them.

speaking of love.
I purposely blog this for Kath Jie.

She went through a lot of trouble for me
JC and her.

So, I'd like to award you :-
'The Best Cousin Ever' award!
'Best Cousin-in-law Ever' award for JC? :P

I remember when I was like 1-9 years old, I kept getting bullied by Ben (her brother)
and she's always there to bash Ben up and save my butt.
She's like the big sister I never had.
She's the one who got me into online shopping.
She's the best (ex)accountant!

and even though I'll never understand your obsession for Winnie the Pooh
even though I'll never understand what's so nice about Martha Steward
or what's so amazing about JC finance and accounts and economy...

I still *heart* you many many times!

hahaha.. I know you're smiling!
You know you love me too XD

P/s: This post has nothing to do with the fact that Kath jie went all the way, got stuck in a jam, had to climb up and down the stairs, just to help me take my new phone. Nope. Nothing like that at all.

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Saturday, September 12, 2009 @ 4:33 PM
My thoughts on this
I hope that this story, even though flawed, will give you readers a little insight as to how it feels like when a girl/woman goes for an abortion. The emotions she felt.
It's not a light issue we just brush away after reading.

Now I know in my story, I made the guy seem evil. Irresponsible and bad.
But you know, if I were a boy (LOL), and a girl told me I made her pregnant, I would have panic. I may even run away.

I dunno what you guys think of the 2 posts before this.. but I just feel so strongly on this issue.

The number of pregnancies and abortions are increasing each day, month, year..

The research:
While I was doing the research for the 'Story of a girl'.

I stumble to a forum where a person asked how much it took to have an abortion in KL.
she said she's 19 this year and she wants to do an abortion.
A person answers RM450-800.

Rm450-800 to take away a life.
RM450-800 to kill a baby.
What is this world coming to..?

A lot of other responders ask her if she was sure she wanted to do an abortion.
Many told her to take care.
She didn't reply though.
I wouldn't too if I was going have an abortion.

I found some shocking details about our Malaysian hospitals and doctors who do abortion in that forum.
A person says that some doctors do it privately. You can't ask at the counter if you want to do an abortion in a general hospital. You've got to ask around quietly another person says.

I also found out the different types of ways they kill the fetus.
At 8 weeks, they use suction to abort the baby.
At 18 weeks, they use salt poisining or dialation and evacuation.

Do you know, at 12 weeks old the baby can feel pain.
Imagine the pain and physical hurt it will feel when the doctor crack all its tiny bones in attempt to kill it.

Abortion is still illegal in Malaysia.
It saddens me that so many babies are to die before being born.

The Facts:
Do you know, when a woman/girl does an abortion, she is risking her health as well?
She is putting herself at risk of getting infection, damage internal organs, hemorrhaging (excessive bleeding) and in extreme cases, she may die.

In Cambodia, there is a man who sat up a home for these unwed mothers. He takes them in. Feeds their children, gives them a place to stay and just takes care of the mothers and kids until they can live on their own. He does all these to help these women to avoid abortions.

The Helpline:
There are a few places that a unwed yet pageant girl can go to before choosing to do abortion.
Agape Malaysia is one of those who help unwed mothers to avoid abortions.
Click HERE to find out more from them. And HERE to contact them.

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@ 3:58 PM
Story of a girl -part 2
If you haven't read the 1st part please do so before continuing with this :)

To her horror
a visible line appear
a deep blue
a line, no doubt.

She was stunned
for the next hour
she sat on the bathroom floor
still clutching on to the positive pregnancy stick
wondering what is to become of her

She called him.
'Hey babe' he said smoothly

She told him.
He was shock.
He told her to be calm.
He told her not to worry.
He take care of things.

She calmed down but terribly frighten.
She waited for him to come back from wherever he is, to her.
She waited and waited.
But he didn't show up.
She waits some more.
Crying again this time.

She tried calling him
but was told his number was no longer in service
she tried every possible way to contact him
but somehow he seems to have disappear.

She doesn't know what to do.
Her belly is growing bigger each day.
She despise that thing inside her
It has robbed her off her freedom
It has robbed her off her love life
She just wants it to go away...

She can't keep it from her family anymore.
If she continues to wear baggy clothes
her mother will start asking
her appetite has grown too
and she can't continue suffering the morning sickness anymore
the vomiting was horrible
and she gets headache every morning.

She has to do something.
she was desperate

by this time, she was 18 weeks along.
She had no one to turn to
No one knew
No one will know
She has made her decision.

And yes,
she went to the Abortion Clinic- secretly, quietly, alone.
The doctor did not say much
He just briefly told her what he was going to do
She only nod
She wanted to run away
but she couldn't..
She lied down on the cold hard table
She didn't remember much
Everything seemed dark and fizzy
She just knew she wanted it done as soon as possible
and she just felt dizzy..

There was pain
There was blood
lots of blood..
She was told she had lost a lot of blood
She was advice to not move around too much after this
She though she had passed out
She was told it's over by the nurse
she was still weak
but somehow she managed to get herself out of that dreaded place..


All those happened 20 years ago.
She's a married middle age woman now.
married to different man.
with 3 children of her own.
None of them knew her past.

And sometimes,
during the night,
when her kids are asleep
and her husband snoring away next to her..
She sheds tears
many silent tears
for her unborn baby
her first baby
the baby she had killed.

she whispers words of apologies to it
but no amount of apology seem to make her feel better
she regretted what she did
she regretted how she felt towards it
She felt like a monster.

She was young
She was naive
alone and afraid
that was the only thing she could do
She hope that one day
when she gets to see her first child in heaven,
she'll hold it close
and tell her how sorry she was
for taking it's life
before it could talk.
She only hopes it will forgive her..

Because that's the only thing she can do.

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@ 12:14 PM
Story of a girl- part 1
There was a girl.
There was a boy.
She was 16
He was 18

They met at a mutual friend's party.
He couldn't take his eyes of her
She was all he wanted in a girl
Bright eyes, long dark curly hair and a mesmerizing smile.

and she couldn't stop stealing glances of him.
He was the sporty kind.
Tall, dark and handsome.

He made his way to where she was talking with her friends
she was aware of that.
she blushed and giggled.

He said 'Hi'
Her heart skipped a beat
She gave her best shy smile
They started talking
She never felt so happy
She was sure she's in love

Before the night had ended,
they were in each other's arm
Again, she felt like she was the luckiest girl in the world.
She doesn't care what others say now
not her parents
not her siblings
not her friends
She was convinced he is The One.

They were young
They were in love
They were together.

Then one day,
she realized that she is late
real late.
3 months late..
She was worried.
She feared for the worst
So she went to the nearest pharmacy
and bought a pregnancy kit
with a shaky hand she paid for it
the cashier looked at her inquisitively
but said nothing.

She rushed back home
and dogged her mother
who asked her if she was alright,
because she looked so pale
She went straight to the her bathroom......

To be continue... :)

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Thursday, September 10, 2009 @ 4:59 PM
Post-trials post
This is a post-trial post.
Yesh it sounds funny. It should be.

Wanna know how trials was for me?

I dunno where to begain.Trials was just soooo fun.
I wish it lasts longer.
Why did it have to end?
I had the greatest time ever!

You're not expecting me to say that are you?
The only good thing I can say about trials is that it looks tame next to STPM.

Why the heck did I take Chemistry in the first place??
I don't care how much CO2 weights!
I don't care what is produced if ethane reacts with pentanoic acid!

Who invented Chemistry?
Ignore me. That's a stupid question.

Pardon me for sounding like a moody student.
that's because I am a moody student.
I shall shut up now.

PS: I can't believe I've been phoneless for 2 weeks stright!
WOW. Like wow. Just wow.
Mind blowing.

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Wednesday, September 2, 2009 @ 5:05 PM
it's GONE! @_@
Would it sound weird/ironic if I tell you guys I lost my hnadphone today?

and the answer to that question on top is, YES.

YES. I lost my phone.
Funny because I also won another phone.

YES. It's ironic that I'll lost my phone when I am entitled to win another phone.

too bad my mum can't see anything funny about this.
Got an earful T__T

Okay.. so I was to blame.
Left my school bag outside of the library and phone was inside. When I came back from the canteen with Jojo.

it's gone.

Hey, I never expcet anyone to take my not-a-PDA-basically-not-a-anything phone.

To whoever that so conveniently took my nothing phone.. yeah whoever you are.. may you have hiccups for the next 3 months :)

Take care you.

I'm trying to see the bright side of things, so thanks for letting me have this chance to do so.

Bright side: I'm so thanking God that was not Cookie :)

P/S: I'm phoneless for the next week. I think. Just until I get my Cookie.

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