Hello Hurricane
you can't
silence my love
Speak up or die
Tammie says Smile!


Hello there, Stranger!
Welcome to my humble little blog.

The name's Tammie, but friends call me Tam (not 'thumb').

Who am I, you ask?
I'm not that smart top-scorer girl in your class.
I'm not that pretty lass you always see on the streets either.
I am passionate, stubborn and emotional.
My absolute most favorite thing to do is hanging out with people I care & love.
My passion burns for Jesus & photography.
I wish to travel more and see more.

This blog was created so I get to jot down my feelings.
Happenings in life.
That is, if I'm not too lazy to update ;)


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Saturday, October 22, 2011 @ 2:45 AM
Healer
If you've been in my life these few days you know its like some sort of drama.

Walking back in the rain?
Ignoring people out of the blue?
Getting mad for no apparent reason?
Getting into a huge argument with a close friend?

Those doesn't sound like me. At all.
If you could time travel and went back to predict to the me one year ago, things that would happen these few days, I would have told you in your face that you're dead wrong.

But alas. How sin can twist us. How the thought of evil and depressing thoughts can wrap us up in it's long, boney, creepy fingers. Never underestimate it's power- dark, hungry and lurking.

To be completely honest, it was all happening in my head- the getting mad for no reason thing. I was thinking depressing thoughts. Which well, surprise, surprise: made me depress. Then it made me angry. And the jokes which were meant to lighten the mood that evening seem to backfire.
Because in my head, I was a mess already. Then the jokes aimed at me came in & everyone finds it funny; while I was deep in depressing thoughts and a raging heart. It was not funny to me. It was the last straw.

Notice how emotional wrecked I've become.

It's sad.
I don't want things to be like this.
But I let them.
I welcome those thoughts.
I entertained them.
In the end?
I fell for the trap the evil one set up.

While being very distressed by what a mess I've gotten myself into, and reflecting about my life.. He spoke to me. I found out that I'm such a hypocrite. I cannot accept it when others make the same mistake over and over; but when I do it to my Father, I always beg/hope/expect Him to forgive me. He provided me 10 steps to be healed again :)
Wow.

Step 2 required me to put myself in their shoes. I did. And I see how they felt. So, I believe I owe them a proper apology.

If you guys are reading this, I'm truly sorry for being so immature and childish. My actions did not justify God. It was a shame to Him and me. All I can say now is I know where I've gone wrong. You can expect it never to happen again. Thank you for putting up with me.

But most of all, a big shout out to my Healer.
He healed me. Again.

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